Red roses, romantic notions and sweet cards. These are amongst some of the things which are associated with 14 February – Valentine’s Day.
It’s the day of the year where flower deliveries are in full swing. Boyfriends and husbands rush to florists and grab or order bouquets to be sent to their loved one. Valentine’s flower bouquets & chocolates are being delivered across the island. It’s the day where most restaurants with romantic vibes are booked out and also a day when expectations are at an all-time high.
Do women really expect gifts on Valentine’s Day? Do they also want to be treated a special way? We had previously shared an article on how to make your partner feel special on Valentine’s Day but read on if you’d like to know how what women really want on this romantic occasion.
Background info on how Valentine’s Day came about
To first get started, perhaps it’ll be good to know a little background information on how the festival initially started. The name of the festival, “Valentine’s Day” comes from Saint Valentine. So who exactly was Saint Valentine?
Though there are a few versions of who Saint Valentine was, the most famous belief was that he was a Roman priest in the third century AD. Back then, Emperor Claudius II had banned marriages because he thought that married men made bad soldiers. However, Valentine felt that this was unfair so he broke the rules and arranged marries in secret.
When Claudius found out about this, Valentine was thrown in jail and sentenced to death. It was there that he fell in love with the jailer’s daughter and when he was about to be taken to be executed on 14th February, he sent her a love letter signed, “From your Valentine”.
Celebrating Valentine’s Day comes from an old tradition which is thought to have originated from a Roman festival. Called Lupercalia, it was celebrated in the middle of February – the start of their springtime. As part of celebrations, boys drew names of girls form a box and they would then be a couple during the festival. Sometimes, they would get married.
The connection between Saint Valentine and romantic love was sealed in 1381 by author, Geoffrey Chaucer who penned “The Parliament of Fowls”, a poem which is the form of a dream vision, containing one of the earliest references to the idea that Valentine’s Day is a special day for lovers.
Do we know what people really want for Valentine’s Day?
According to a survey done in 2019 by YouGov, on Valentine’s Day, people are likely to give gifts their romantic partners (64%), their children (22%), or other family members (13%).
Over three in ten (31%) women say they would like to receive a card, while 28% are hoping for chocolates/candy and 27% would like flowers. Another gift many women say they would like to receive is jewellery (18%), followed by a certificate for a massage or spa day (14%).
On the other hand, men might prove a little harder (or maybe easier) to shop for, as 41% say they would not like to receive anything for Valentine’s Day. That said, 16% of men say they would like chocolates/candy, while a near-equal number (15%) would like to receive a card. Another 9% say they’d like to get a bottle of wine or liquor to mark the occasion, while an equal number would welcome the gift of electronics. Breakfast in bed (7%) is also a popular option.
People who are parents of children under 18 are particularly likely (14%) to say they’d like to receive wine or liquor for Valentine’s Day, compared to only 9% of the total population who chose this answer. 16% of parents say breakfast in bed is something they’d like for Valentine’s Day, contrasted with 9% of the total population.
Overall, men are generally set to spend more than women are for their Valentine’s Day celebration, including gifts, travel and meals. Over four in ten (43%) men are spending $50 or more on Valentine’s Day celebrations, while only 27% of women are spending upwards of $50 for the celebration. People with household incomes of $80,000 or more are the most likely (12%) to be spending $200 or more for the occasion. Only 2% of those earning less than $40,000, and 2% of those earning between $40,000 and $80,000 have similar spending plans.
Do Singaporeans really even celebrate Valentine’s Day?
According to an article published in February 2019, by Business Insider, Conducted by market research company YouGov, the survey of 1,041 Singaporeans found that respondents are planning to spend an average of S$123 (US$90.80) on a present for Valentine’s Day.
A small proportion of respondents (2%) who were planning on gifting said they were planning to give a gift that doesn’t cost any money at all – after all, some romantics believe that money can’t buy love and happiness.
Slightly more than half, or 56%, of those buying gifts will pay via credit card, while 23% will do so by cash, and 19% via debit card. Out of all respondents, only 34% said they will be celebrating Valentine’s Day this year. The three groups of people most likely to celebrate Valentine’s are the young, unmarried and new couples.
According to the survey, 45% of those aged 18 to 24 will be celebrating Valentine’s Day compared to only under a quarter of those aged 55 and above.
Also, 63% of unmarried couples will be celebrating the day of love, compared to only 37% of married ones. The survey also found that the longer two people are in a relationship, the less likely they are to celebrate Valentine’s Day.
A total of 76% of couples who have been in a relationship for less than a year will be celebrating Valentine’s this year. In contrast, only 27% of couples who have been together for 20 years or more are planning to do so.
Around 66% of respondents said they would not be celebrating Valentine’s Day, and the top reason was that they found it too commercialised (47%).
Other reasons include viewing Valentine’s Day as just a regular day (46%); that everything is more expensive on Valentine’s Day (36%); and the lack of a romantic partner to celebrate with (26%).
Do we know what Singaporean women really want for Valentine’s Day?
With the surveys done by YouGov showing that only 34% of respondents would be celebrating Valentine’s Day as close to 50% feel that it’s overly commercialised, you might then ask the question on whether Singaporean women expect anything from their partners during Valentine’s Day. From a perspective of a Singaporean millennial woman, aged 26, the answer would still be a resounding yes.
Though many may liken Valentine’s Day to an overly commercialised festival, everyone loves feeling wanted and special. That is the reason why according to an article by Metro, 15% of women apparently send themselves flowers every Valentine’s Day.
A survey of thousands of single ladies across the globe by date.com found out there’s a lot that women do for themselves on Valentine’s Day. When asked if they had ever invented a Valentine an incredible 75% said yes, with many admitting sending flowers, signing made-up cards and buying chocolates. When asked why, 65% of the women said they wanted to feel special, 15% claimed it was so the men in their office would notice them and 5% so they did not feel lonely and depressed.
Apart from that, another compelling reason to gift your loved one something during Valentine’s Day is because one’s love language could be gifts. Dr. Gary Chapman had written a book about the five different love languages, of which one is gifts. Romantically speaking, one could score extra points by appealing to his or her partner’s love language as it’s a way to see which kind of gesture or action they appreciate more from others. Showering a partner whose love language is gifts during Valentine’s Day would mean the world to her as they actually appreciate the thought behind the gift:
While the love language may be confused with materialism; the receiver of gifts actually thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous – so would the absence of everyday gestures. Gifts are visual representations of love and are treasured greatly. https://www.5lovelanguages.com/languages/receiving-gifts/
Personally, I would be part of the 27% who said that they would like flowers. My next favourite item to receive during Valentine’s Day would be a card. As a 26-year-old millennial, we’ve part of the generation which relies heavily on technology. Text messages and Instagram stories are a huge part of our daily lives. If my partner or boyfriend took the effort to send a thoughtful handwritten card and a bouquet of red roses, this appeals to the traditional romantic in me.
It’s a romantic notion as it goes beyond what many others could do during this special occasion – by simply sending a text message to say “I love you”. By receiving a bouquet on the occasion alone along with a heartfelt message, it also goes to prove that he’s willing to spend more on such a “commercialised” occasion in order to make me smile. Receiving a bouquet of pretty red roses in school or when you’re at work would also be a lovely surprise as his gesture of love publicly shows the world how much he cares and dotes on you.
What flowers should I send her for Valentine’s Day?
Valentine’s Day is a huge event to send flowers to your girlfriend, wife or partner. In fact, many florists even have their own pages with curated romantic bouquets specially for Valentine’s Day. You can check out gorgeous options here: https://www.24hrscityflorist.com/valentine-day/
If you’re a guy and not sure on what kind of bouquet to send to her, you can always arrange for a bouquet of her favourite flowers to be sent to her. Though red roses would be the most conventional and popular option during this festival due to it’s connotation of it being symbolic with passionate love, there’s no hard and fast rule that Valentine Day bouquets must comprise of roses.
If your loved one prefers hydrangeas, why not send her a gorgeous bouquet of hydrangea, mathiola and rose flowers. Else you can even send her a cute and unique flower bouquet with a flower arrangement of her favourite cartoon character such as hello kitty. That’s bound to be a bouquet that would get her surrounding colleagues and friends jealous. Not only that, it’ll definitely be a bouquet and Valentine’s Day that she’ll remember for life.
If your girlfriend/wife or partner does prefer a more traditional option such as red roses, do take note of the different symbolic meanings to the number of red roses sent and the meaning it conveys:
99 stalks rose bouquet available on 24HrsCityFlorist.com
12-stalk rose bouquets: You might want to express your interest in her
24-stalk rose bouquet: To tell her that you’re her Valentine
99-stalk rose bouquet: Forever in love with her
If you’re planning on sending roses, it’ll be good to read more about the meaning of different coloured roses and number of stalks of roses in a bouquets here.
Personally, as a woman, I feel that you can’t go wrong with a good ol’fashioned red rose bouquet because of the meaning it symbolises. While not every lady may take note of the symbolism behind rose bouquets, it has been ingrained in many that red roses are equivalent to an expression of love. As such, even if it may not be her favourite type of bloom, guys can rest assured that your intentions are well conveyed.
Valentine’s Day is not the only occasion that guys ought to send flowers to girls. Men can take other opportunities to send her favourite or different types of bouquets to loved ones.
How should I treat her on the day itself?
Most women in generally, want their man to treat them like a princess. That doesn’t mean spoiling them silly with frivolous gifts and nonsensical excessive spending. It just means that they would like their boyfriend or husband to treat them well. While this doesn’t only have to occur on Valentine’s Day, this is what most women would expect on such a romanticised occasion. Everyone has a different definition and perspective of what it means to be treated like a princess but there are some standards that all women would agree on.
- Be a gentleman
This includes small simple gestures such as offering to pick her up from work for a romantic dinner. It could also include actions like holding the door or opening the car door for her. It would be a bonus if you send her home as well!
- Being polite
It’s important to be polite. Try not to argue and fight on Valentine’s Day. Both parties in the relationship should try and be more considerate and understanding towards this other.
- Get a meaningful gift
While it is true that sometimes one’s company and presence is the best gift to another, it doesn’t hurt to turn up with a small gift in hand. The gift need not be expensive, it just has to be meaningful to her. It could be something symbolic of your relationship or something that means the world to her.
- Offer to pay
If you’re out for a dinner date, it would be nice for guys to at least offer to pay for the meal. Not every couple believes in this, but on Valentine’s Day, most women would hope that the man offers to pay for the meal.
- Be present
The most important of all – to be present in the moment. This means not just being present physically and going through the motions but actually being present emotionally. This means giving her your undivided attention and listening to what she is saying. It’s about effectively communicating and being concerned and interested in what she has to say.
Is love really defined by gifts?
It’s not a must to gift your girlfriend or wife something on Valentine’s Day but it would be nice to – be it even a simple handmade gift. It’s the thought and meaning behind the gift that matters. While the occasion may be commercialised, it still does not make the meaning of the day any less special. It’s to celebrate love.
You could choose to send a flower bouquet delivery or even bake cookies just to gift your loved one but do remember – gifts make her smile, but even if you’re gifting experiences such as movie tickets or staycations, the most important gift is being present in the moment. She fell in love with you not because of all the gifts but because of who you are as a person. Don’t forget to appreciate your partner and most importantly show her that you love her in your own way.
Please drop us a comment below what you think women want for valentine’s day?
The best thing to hold onto in life is each other – Audrey Hepburn
Written by: Elizabeth Tan